Episode 3: Paul Blart - Mall Cop 2009

Starring: Kevin James, Keir O’Donnell, Jayma Mays
Rated PG
Paul Blart Mall Cop Movie Poster

Paul Blart – Mall Cop

As a special Thanksgiving treat, Wayne and Nancy watched Paul Blart: Mall Cop. What does this have to do with Thanksgiving you ask? Some of the movie’s events take place on Black Friday! What’s more Thanksgiving-esque than that? Please tune in to see what Wayne and Nancy thought about this flick and to find out what they have in mind for a special Christmas episode next month!

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Transcript

00:07 [Intro Music] welcome to lunchtime movie critics where we watch them. So you don’t have to today it’s my pick and to correspond with Thanksgiving, I chose Paul Blart mall cop, which is super tightly related to Thanksgiving, very tightly related to Thanksgiving as they eat a Thanksgiving dinner and then he saves the day on black Friday because what’s more Thanksgiving than black Friday? Right, right. I agree. You know, I mean we spend the whole day being thankful for the stuff we have and then go spend money for things. We don’t need people up to get to it. Right. Yeah. Anyway, this is probably the highest quality movie we will ever watch. At least so far maybe, you know, like the introduction itself was, it’s like super fancy compared to the cheesy introductions we’ve had before. I don’t know. Monster squad was a good pick and this definitely had the biggest name actor.

01:11 Oh yeah, for sure. And Cary grant. Oh yeah, that’s true. Cause carrying your aunts still is pretty currently the biggest name currently relevant and alive and alive carry. Anyway. So many people have watched Paul Blart mall cop. I just want to point out that his mustache is my favorite and I think only it’s another thing I wanted to say is that I think Olin Kevie, Kevin James could play this role. I think this is like a role that, I don’t know if even like Jim Gaffigan could have pulled this role off. Kara talk. No, because he’s annoying is so gross. Sorry. No, not in the Garret, but as out of like the standup comedians that you can think of who could play this role any better than Kevin James. Right. He, he’s our, I feel like he’s kind of our current comedian who is like, I’m sort of the slapstick comedy, you know, like John header in the, you know, 70s and 80s, you know, did the falling all over himself kind of thing.

02:21 Kevin James is the only actor I can think of right now that we have currently that does that. Is that physical evidence of a comedian. Even his stand up is, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you should watch his stand up. Never don’t give up this, my favorite standup special from him and it’s on Netflix. But anyway, Paul Blart mall cop, it’s on Netflix or you can rent it on Amazon prime and other places. So in the very beginning of the movie, he is trying out for the New Jersey state trooper state troopers. I thought I didn’t write that part down because that it was state troopers, but I didn’t, I don’t think I realized that at the beginning. Yeah, it was just like the police Academy or something. Yeah. He was trying to like pass the test and he wrote pass the written portion. Now he’s trying to do the physical person.

03:11 You see him, he’s chewing some gum before and then he goes through it and you’re like, man, this guy’s rocking this, this big man. Cause he’s not little. I don’t know that Kevin James is notorious for his size. He killed those tires, killed those tires and that balance beam and that wall. And then he falls asleep one foot before the finish line. Like he face plants into the ground and slides on the grass and does not cross the finish line because of a, a big problem plaguing this country. I’m kidding. I don’t know hypoglycemia. Glycemia and so that night at dinner [inaudible] sugar in his body. Well, my favorite quote, I wrote this down as we all have our crosses to bear sweetheart, mine is named hypoglycemia and his mom offers him pie. And he’s like, yes, no, actually, no, no, no. You said no. He’s like, no, no going to happen by, I’m kidding.

04:09 No, I, yeah, no, actually right now bring the pie right now. And then he takes the peanut butter and spreads it on the pie and he says, weird. I’ve never seen, I’ve never seen anybody do that. And he goes, ah, peanut butter. It just fills the cracks of the heart. You’re just like, Oh Kevin James or Kevin James, he does sound kind of pathetic up to this point, right? So they signed him up for online dating and they’re like, well what do you want to say about yourself? And he goes, well, I knew a lot about sharks.

04:46 I would just say like just before that, when they’re talking about his daughter’s mom, his ex, and she was an illegal immigrant from Mexico. And I just think, I thought it was really cute. Like where they were, you know, kind of making some, you know, not really bad comments, but just like, you know, she used you, that kind of thing. And he was still like defending her. This really sweet. You could tell he really loved her even though she tricked him and he’s like, we did have some good times before she tricked me to me. I, I thought it was really cute that he made that segue montage video. I was like, don’t worry dear. We’ll edit out this funny. Hmm. Oh, okay. That was him like rock in the segway. Yeah, totally. Like spinning around and tricks and I’ve never written on a segway.

05:46 They kind of scare me a little. I feel like I would fall off. I don’t think they’re made for stunt writing. No, probably not. And then we go into, he’s on his way to work and he leaves his garage on a segway and a dog starts chasing him and he hits the dog. That is kind of funny. Like I thought to myself when he leaves the garage, like the garage door opens and he comes out looking kinda tough. Right on a segway in his uniform and I, and I was thinking he doesn’t even own a car. Does he know? He just owns a segway and he has a spare one in his garage. Oh did he? I noticed that when the garage came up he had another one on the side.

06:29 So it’s a two segway garage. Wow. There are two segway family. I guess I didn’t, I didn’t notice that. And speaking of segue, him riding around the mall like helps people along the way. Yeah, it was, it was really over the top like, Oh yeah, he’s like literally a mall cop because he’s like, you know a guy like an old guy on a scooter, like a motor tries to like pull him over. Yeah. He tries to pull the guy over cause he’s going too fast and the guy doesn’t, you know, he’s like, you gotta be kidding me. Right, right. Just basically takes off pulling Kevin James behind him for a few feet and so we love Kevin James. He can pull off the physical comedy and it’s not in a like three Stooges poke you in the eye. It’s not really slapstick, it’s just physical. It’s just really physical.

07:20 But I, I did like the time when he’s staring at the young girl that he has a crush on this, this lady, and she works at unbelievable, which is like, it’s like it’s a mall, so it’s like one of those little kiosks bubble if you didn’t catch that. Yeah, she’s you in like the hair extensions, the like, you know, clipping color pieces and stuff like that. And the actress’s name, you just seem amaz Jayma mummies and she looks like a Disney princess. Yes. Price noted. I think probably hurting her, her most known roles where this one and the Smurfs some piece. No way. Yeah. She was in the Smurfs movies. Neil Patrick Harris and I thought wasn’t Zooey Deschanel in there too? No, no Metro. She was in trolls. She was in the, yeah. Oh, she voiced a troll, sorry. [inaudible] Oh yeah. I had to like mental Rolodex trolls. Yeah, right. She voiced one of the trolls. Yes. Anyway. Zody let me do. She’s great. So one thing that I was saying was that, you know, he’s watching her and he’s riding a segway and he face plants into a van and then later on she’s like, didn’t you run into that van over there?

08:54 Doesn’t need to say something when he hits it. Like that’s not as cute. So funny. Anyway, did you know that the jerky security guard that like, you know, he’s Sammy in the wedding singer? He is [inaudible] so this one, a lot of Adam Sandler movies, right? Because this movie was produced by Adam Sandler by what’s it called? A happy Madison. Yeah. So he was, he’s one of the people who’s been in like every Adam Sanchez, but I love them as CME in the wedding. That’s the wedding singer. He’s the limo driver and he like opens up two of them about, anyway, he was really good, Tim in we’re totally getting off topic, but I loved him in grandma’s boy. I don’t think I ever watched that, which has some really inappropriate parts because it’s all about marijuana. But it is really fun. So Sammy, I mentioned that because he goes to check in with the other guard and he’s just like, so you know, with the kiosk and he goes, why do I care?

10:03 Yeah. He’s all professional about his job and these other people just don’t really care. And so he’s really tricky about it. And then he’s like, they need you in Victoria’s secret and it’s the larger lady and another lady arguing over [inaudible] pushup bra. We should, we should also state that like at this, before this, right before this, he’s been tasked with sort of being lead, letting a new guy shadow him. Oh yes. He’s training. So he’s got this new younger guy that’s, yeah. Kind of shadowing him as he goes about his business. I forgot to make a note about that. Is the name Beck? Yeah, that’s a weird name. Sounds like a last name, right? Maybe it is. I was not supposed to be, no, it’s not supposed to be something else, right? You’re right. Yeah. Anyway, Victoria’s secret scene and she throws down her Coke and he goes waterproof shoes, baggies on the socks.

10:57 Not my first rodeo. Yeah. I thought that was great. And then he like pulled her aside and how X about eating healthy and stuff and he was PS. Yeah. So these two women are like arguing over the last of this bra or something at, at Victoria’s secret and one of them is a little heavier and so he kind of pulls her aside trying to get her to sort of back down on the argument. But he’s talking to her about her weight and terrible. Yeah. Trying to like, you know, identify with her, cause he’s a large guy, you know, but she’s very offended and she beats the tar out of him. Yes. And the guy that he’s training just stands there like he’s like in fact just watches. Yeah. Yup. So I love the eat right after that, when they’re on the segways going down the hallway, like in the basement or whatever, and he’s like, he’s got like, like toilet paper up his nose to stop the bleeding.

11:57 He’s completely beat up, ties shoved into his pocket. And he just, the only thing he says in that scene is he goes, I know you’re new and all, but I think the term backup is pretty universal. It was really funny. Obviously the other guy did not care. No. Did not care. So then he escorts the unbelievable girl, her name is Amy. So you find out and he escorts her to her car by right. Like letting her ride on his segway. This whole montage over there. I like having fun. Yeah. It’s like in slow motion, her hair is blowing in the breeze and the writing in the mall and her hair is blowing and you can see him behind kind of like, you know, looking and smiling at her and, but it’s cute. The line right before they actually, she actually gets on it, she says, she says like, well, couldn’t you get fired for doing that?

12:55 And he’s like, well, yeah, actually. And she’s like, okay. So it’s like this, he’s willing to take a risk for her. Okay. It is. She, she does ask is it safe? And he’ll go and he goes, you’ll be as safe as the press precedent. Yeah. Like I wouldn’t suggest this of an untrained writer, but with me you’ll be safe as the president. Yeah. so later that night they go to American Joe’s ch I’d never heard of that place. It doesn’t really exist. I don’t think I looked it up and Joe’s American is a place so I think this is just supposed to be, cause I, I figured they did that with some of them. Those like mall stores and stuff. Cause that for like the rain forest. Since you, since you mentioned mall stores, can I mention one of the weirdest things that stuck out to me about one of the stores?

13:43 Yes, please do. One of the stores that you see the sign on the outside is legal seafood. I never noticed that. You see it several times and I’m like legal seafood. Why would it be called legal seafood? What an odd name, right? Yeah. And and as a detective or anything, there you go. Yeah, that seems, that seems a little sketchy. But yeah. What an odd name. Right? So they like everyone that works at the mall is going to American Joe’s that night. And he doesn’t really directly get invited by the jerky pen salesman for your to say. But Amy invites him and so he comes and right before he goes over to her table, he pulls out a pack of gum and pops each one out at the lesser pack. Well it shoves it, I smell and he walks in and a leather jacket that is completely covered in grommets, like little metal grommets and you’re like,

14:42 Yep,

14:43 Well that co wouldn’t really exist in real life. Cause like you think that he wore it to look cool, but there’s no way that’s, you know, it just, so he takes it off immediately, right? Yeah. Pops all of the gum. Yeah. Pops all of the government and throws it in his mouth. Well he goes up to Amy and the jerky pen salesman is like, go buy yourself a fruity girl drink or whatever. So she goes off to buy a drink and he starts bullying him and saying like, like, you might as well just give up on her because we’re basically already together. Yeah. He’s such a jerk. He has, yeah. He’s such a jerk. And then his trainee security guard comes up and starts talking like, and telling them off and telling them. And the Turkey pins, salesman, I wrote this down, he goes, I’ve just bought a Camry so you can eat me.

15:39 I’m like, like, like the security guard is like, who are you? You’re just a pen salesman. And he’s like, well, I just bought a Camry so you can eat. We all right. Wow. A Camry, Paul Blair gets into a nacho eating contest, right. And the peppers are too hot. So he drinks like a pitcher of margarita. Well, he thinks it’s lemonade and he after this, like after the second glass, he’s like this laminate’s insane or something like that. And somebody says, well, that’s because it’s a margarita and he doesn’t drink. So his tolerance is really low and he makes poor choices. Very poor choices. Yeah. Including the very next day or something. He liked leans forward and his daughter is like, what is that? Oh gosh. Patio on the smaller Blockness monster. Yeah. And every time, every time you catch one of those things, from this point on, he’s like, I don’t train.

16:43 So yeah, American Joe’s situation doesn’t go well for him. Embarrassing themselves in front of Amy and he feels terrible again yet common theme of this movie. Yeah. Just kinda down in the dogs and discouraged and stuff like that. Well, the next day is black Friday or no thing. It shows you Thanksgiving. Right. And that’s when you see the Lochness monster. Right. And then that next morning is black Friday. So he’s working all day that day and it’s crazy. And then that night he goes to close up the arcade and this would probably be a good place for a break. Okay.

17:27 And we’re back and we’re back. All right. So black Friday he goes to close up the arcade and he decides to play a game. Well, he does the running one. That was weird. I’ve never seen a game like that and he just can’t run. No. Cause it’s actually running on a treadmill. It’s trying to run and do hurdles like Olympic, you know, running with hurdles and he’s a big guy and he’s running on this treadmill and yeah, no, he fails. It fails miserably. So he does guitar hero. Yes. And it’s not just guitar hero. I feel like it’s like band hero because he’s got, Oh he’s got the mic, he’s got the microphone. And what’s the song he’s doing? I can’t remember. Some good classic rock in this movie though. Yeah. Oh yeah, definitely. Yeah, some good classic rock sounds. But while he’s doing that, this gang comes in and shuts down the mall, kicks everyone out [inaudible] and forces everyone out and he doesn’t know what’s going on cause he’s playing, he’s locked inside the arcade facing opposite the door. And did you notice that there were people banging on the arcade or trying to get him help? I didn’t notice that the first, cause I watched the first half once and then I watched the whole movie at separate time and I didn’t catch it the first time, but the second time. And he’s just rocking it. Yeah. Yes. So he’s distracted and plot twist vac. The training security guard is the leader of [inaudible].

19:00 Oh yeah. Oh, before this, I forgot to mention that Paul gets, does not have a phone. And so he borrows one from the phone kiosk guy and his daughter. What’s his name? Yes. And his daughter got into trouble also. She took away his phone. Well, yeah. [inaudible] I love him. He’s so funny. He’s so funny. He’s the ex boyfriend and he’s the young lady and they’re, they’re Indian. The cell phone guy and the daughter and the boyfriend, ex boyfriend are Indian, but who’d food? Yeah, I love that scene that you’re coming up to where he calls the girl the ex-girlfriend’s phone and he knows it’s not her and you don’t know why at first, but he knows it’s someone else answering. And so Paul answers the phone and he says, he’s like, does she make you feel so great with his great accent and everything?

20:02 And he’s like, I can’t remember the girl’s name, but but Paul explains to him like, Hey, I art, I see what’s going on. You’re boohooed. And the girl’s dad, like, she’s in trouble. So he let me use her phone temporarily. So he kind of starts telling him what’s going on, a little bit about what’s going on in his life, not what’s going on at the mall. We don’t know anything about that yet. Right. This is before they take over the mall, right. Before. Yep. Yeah. So anyway, after they take over the mall, he got, he is when he calls or poo, who calls him, right. It’s like right when it’s being taken over. And so like he starts having this heartfelt conversation with food and he becomes a wise man to food foods. Like you’re my homeboy now. Yeah. Yeah. Oh. And he makes a comment that he knows, he says like, well, you’re at the mall, so why don’t you go do this?

20:56 And he’s like, how do you know I’m at the mall? And he says, don’t judge me. Paul blurred. But I, I have tracking software on her phone. Yes. So he knows where he got the GPS on her phone. So anyway, after the conversation with boohooed, he goes out and he’s like, Oh, closing time already. Yeah. Like he didn’t realize he spent that much time in arcade. So everyone’s gone and he’s walking around, but then he sees some of the King and he’s like, this is not happening. This is not happening. Right? Yeah. He runs into somebody and says like, excuse me, sir, the mall is closed. I can help you find your way to an exit. And then somebody comes up with a gun and he’s like, Oh gosh, like speeds off on a segway. Yeah. And now it runs them on his segway and gets through a door and I’ll follow him. I don’t know. I don’t know. Whatever. And so he stops and he gets out of sight of those guys and he goes, what are you trained to do? Nothing. Nothing.

21:57 And then they have a current, like a credo that’s like observe, deter, report, something like that. Observe. Yeah. Something like that. Deter. That was funny. Yes. but one of my things that I liked was don’t die. Go die. Dope. Dope. [inaudible] Was the hilarious, Oh, I should mention Wayne is sick. Bit of a cold. So, Oh, fall, I don’t sound like me. And anyway, and then he calls, no, he’s on his walkie talkie. Right. Right. And they’re like communicating with him and stuff like that. And his boss communicating with the police that are outside at this point. They know there’s hostages, which of course the salesmen and Amy are hostages along with the hot sauce man. Right. I forgot about, I forget his name, but he is wearing the shirt with flames. He’s hilarious. I have one line that I want to talk about later that I love and he gives some hot tests DePaul alert earlier, right?

23:03 That was called devil’s crotch. Yes. Yeah. Feel the burn. Right. so he’s on the walkie talkie with his boss and he goes, I swore an oath and the bosses go check this mall. Right. What else? We don’t have an oath as well. I kind of wrote one and then he goes, let’s face it son. You present a huge target that line like, cause they’re trying to talk him into just coming out and out and sees Amy’s car. Right. And then goes back in and so he’s got to save the day. And so he’s talking to his boss anyway, then had spotted by some of the gang members and he goes into a store and he’s hanging from the ducks. Can I just say yes from this point on, the movie is pretty much like the best Christmas movie ever of all time die hard. Oh yeah.

24:00 Yeah. It’s totally die hard. It’s totally die-hard. Yeah. Including the duct scene that I’m about to talk about. That’s what made me think yes. Same. So I thought of diehard as well. I also thought of Lego movie too. Joe want to just quick little reference in there. Bruce. Phyllis is a not movie, is he? Yes, and she’s crawling through ducks and she runs into Bruce. Phyllis. He goes, I spend a lot of time in ducks. I do have a home like Lego, Lego. Bruce Bell is in that movie, but that was just a side note. So his legs are dangling out of the doctorate and the reason for that is because apparently that’s part of the aesthetic. Yeah. Decoration has these low legs hanging out from this. He gets a Levi’s store or something or like a store where there’s jeans. I was confused by the sale. Anyway, he’s hanging out of the ducks and his stomach starts Crowley and he goes, Oh, I miss lunch. And there’s two henchmen right below him. Yup. So they get some sort of weapon. They’re trying to get him down and then he falls down with the doctor work off of the satellite, the woman knocking out the woman and he tells his boss one down, I want the record to state that I did not hit a woman. I put my weight, my weight on her boss was like, Oh Paul.

25:31 And he’s like, she’s okay. Right. So then he’s trying to sneak around the mall trying to find the other henchmen and he does the classic scene of him sliding and not quite making it. And then, yeah, so I called it the slide and scooch. Oh that’s good. It’s a good scene. But anyway, that part made me feel like if I were trying to be a spy I would be very much like Paul Clark, like a regular person. But spoiler alert, he is successful in stopping everyone. I don’t think I would be successful if somebody was trying to take over the college where the exits are.

26:17 Runaway. Yeah. So then he’s like, there’s a few other scenes where he’s trying to get all those henchmen and stuff like that, but then he adds to the bank and he’s trying to be sneaking and get a closer look at fake and he gets to where the teller line is. Oh, I thought that was weird. I know he goes through the whole line like zigzags it is. She was her squeaking like nobody him. Right. But then on his way out he just flips up the dividers as he runs through. Right. And then they see him. Right? Yeah, it was, I thought that was seen was really funny though, because as he’s like in this position and screeching through, just trying to be honest. Yeah. So a guy chases him into the spray tan booth, right. And locks him in there and starts the spray tan and so he ends up very dirty, like die hard.

27:13 Right. And just progressively more, I feel like planning like probably following diehard in a ways mixed with Rambo towards the end, I think with the rainforest cafe. Oh sure, sure. Yeah. So we should also say that Amy has her cell phone during this whole thing, even though all the bad guys took away everybody’s cell phone, she said she didn’t have one. Yeah. And so one of my favorite lines from the henchmen is time for some big game hunting. Oh, that’s right. That’s right. And then he’s chasing him and skateboards through an elevator, like the glass elevator. And I’m pretty sure he couldn’t do that. Probably not. But the, the bad guys, the henchmen in this are like extreme sports people. They’re all BMX bikers, skateboarders, pores like jump multiple levels in the mall on their bike and things like that. So then they’re outside on the roof.

28:11 This is like skipping a few scenes and they’re fighting on that. And he’s like skateboards from one roof. Not Kevin James. No. Yeah, sorry. He’s on his way. He’s on a segway though. Yeah. So he does the same thing on a segway and totally nails it. Nails it and takes the guy out and they land in the ball pit. And my favorite part is when like the ball start rumbling and like you just out on this out is segway. No. So what’s weird about that is this, there’s like there’s a continuity problem there. Yeah. Where he hits the glass on the ceiling and he goes over the segway with the guy through the glass into the ball pit. Theoretically if the segway, we’re going to be in there, it was going to fall on top of them, but somehow it rumbles and he comes out on the segway.

29:01 Right. It makes it funny. But yes, there’s a lot of continuity problems with us. And then he head butts him and says nobody wins with a head. But yeah, cause he’s like in pain too. Nobody wins. So the, so the line that I was talking about with the hotdog guy, but I thought yes is earlier when vac talks to the police the first time [inaudible] his demand, he says, he’s like, what do you want? And he says you know, a happy meal but not this toy. I want this toy or whatever, just being a smart Alec. Well later then when VAT comes in and almost catches Amy with her phone, he’s like, what are you doing? You know, cause we you nodding at [inaudible] or something like that guy was like nodding his head and he’s like, he’s like, Oh, I was just wondering if you were serious about that happy meal.

29:50 He’s a big guy. Yeah. And he’s like, I was just wondering if you were serious about that happy meal. And then he says it’s not common as it is really cute. It was, I liked that scene too cause good. Then his boss that’s outside with the police army, right? Well the SWAT team shows up and takes control and the police captain that’s there is certain to get run over by this SWAT team. And apparently his boss was writing down come back. That was so funny. And he gives them to the police chief and, and they’re like, classic comebacks. I’m rubber. You’re glue. Yes. And one of them was you and what army? And the guy goes, what’s wrong with that? And he goes, he has an army. It was really, I thought the boss great. Kind of bumbling too. And it was like Kevin James.

30:45 Yes it was. It was cute. So Kevin James, he’s got honor roll. He’s gotten a few of the henchmen at this point, knocked him out and he’s collecting these credit card machine codes. That’s what the bad guys are doing. Yeah. Yeah. And so he is collecting them as well as storing them into his phone. So then kind of leverage or something. I don’t know, like why he was doing, he was just taking them off. Okay, well then he plans this whole thing in the rainforest cafe. Right. It’s very like a home alone. Yes. That’s a booby traps and stuff. Much like Homeloan. He sets up booby traps and everything. And then a note that said that you didn’t write your notes down and I’m like still a little sad that I’m the only one going off of notes here. I remember it. We’re doing well and good job.

31:40 Thank you. So anyway, he starting to instigate with Beck now about, you know, meeting him in his place of preference. Right. Well then his hypoglycemia hits and he starts mumbling his words and then he passes out, hits his head on the desk and falls to the ground. But he comes to, there is a piece of candy to sucker the cover, however, did gross. I couldn’t like, Oh but he needs the sugar. He needs the sugar to go cause he always had a set of sugar in his body. So he crunches the candy and he gets up and it has like this renewed energy suddenly like it hits your bloodstream that quickly. It’s just, that was just so gross. Yeah. So I had to imagine it was just like coconut and cookie Chrome as audit instead of like, cause that’s what it kind of looked like.

32:37 Even though it was dirt, you know, I don’t know. He blew on it before. He likes nothing and he’s like, I’m going to meet you on the corner of net and for, do you get that pretty much? Never from Kevin James or like dad jokes. They’re totally dad jokes, which is great. So after the whole like rainforest cafe thing and he doesn’t get back, he distracts that and he goes to get the hostages and try to get them out and they’re trying to get the large hot sauce man out using a rope through the roof where the roof tiles and then they all fall through there one at a time. And I thought it was so funny. I think this movie is hilarious. So cheesy, so, so fun. I finally like, so they all fall and there’s, he distracts vac somehow grabs this bottle of hot sauce, throws the phone at him and that catches the phone.

33:46 And so Beck’s not looking right. That’s right. So then he grabs this bottle of hot sauce out of like a holster or something unscrews the top and like splashes two drops of sauce that hit vac in the eye. Yeah. Perfect moment to like go tackle him and they’re all like go. And he just stands there. And then when vet gets the sauce out of zine, puts the gun up again. He’s like, I should have capitalized on that. Yeah. Probably should have capitalized on that. That was fine. And then he gets in the minivan to chase back back. Takes Amy and Paul’s daughters showed up later. We don’t have to go into detail. Yeah. Takes them into a van, starts leaving. He gets in the minivan that he faced plants into earlier and goes through a store called Janet’s closet. Oh, I didn’t notice that. And he drives out of drives out of breaking all the windows.
34:43 Still has the bow on the front of it, the SWAT guys trying to communicate to him and he’s trying to roll down the window, can’t roll down the window. He’s rolling down. All the other windows are. Yeah. And then he goes around to get in. The SWAT guy dies and Paul dark can’t unlock the door and then they’re chasing him. So Paul Barr and SWAT guy switched seats. Paul climbs up onto the roof and tries to jump onto the other van. [inaudible] And misses, right. And Paul Blart fashion. And then he’s running and falls about running. And I just really personally related to all of that, like I would totally follow all running. In fact, I have I running that fast. And you’re trying to catch it truck or something? Yeah, I would do. So we’re nearing the end of the movie, right. He confronts back [inaudible] and they’re fighting and he falls to the ground and his shirt is pulled up more. You can see his whole back can see his whole bag and somehow the night he got drunk he got a whole back piece tattoo one night. Yeah. I don’t even know how that was possible, but it’s a lot of hours. Everybody stops and stares and he just laying there it goes, I don’t drink.

36:05 Then he pretends to have hypoglycemia. [inaudible] Falls to the ground back is like Ugh. And he does a little leg sweep and just knocks him down. Then comes the another plot twist. Right. So now vac is taken out. Yeah, but the SWAT leader guy who went to school with Paul is really part of this too. Maybe the leader, we’re not sure or we’re not, or co-leader or something like that. And so yeah, he’s kind of taken over. Well then the police chief, I guess, I dunno what rank he is, but anyway, police chief shows up with Paula blurts boss and Paula is boss shoots the SWAT leader and then is shaking and then a she. Yeah, so the police man goes over there, arrest him and his one liner is come back finally is here flights man you canceled because they were trying to get on a plane, like private jet at the airport. So to go to the Cape White’s been canceled and then the boss says that’s better than anything. I’ve got two wellness. It was so then they’re standing there and it’s nice ending. Every, all the bad guys have been caught. Like I said before, if I was trying to be a spy I wouldn’t have been this successful. Oh. But the daughter looks at her dad and looks at Amy and goes, she doesn’t need a green card.

37:42 That was great. That was good. So, so then you get the impression that they get together. He did. You not watch the credits, what they get married in the mall and she’s out of white segway. Oh my gosh. But before that he gives her a birthday card. Yes. That was great. Inside it says you are like a great meal. You make me stuffed with feelings. Plus I don’t need to unbutton my pants with Thanksgiving coming here. Well forget those Thanksgiving pants. People see, she makes a comment earlier that her birthday is on black Friday and so she probably won’t even get a card. So he goes, bring us into the hallmark store to get his segue on the segway to get her a card and this is the car that he later gives her and he gets offered a job at the police department or something like that.

38:44 And he goes, no. Yeah, the cop is like, I hear you’ve been trying to become a state trooper, right? Well you’re welcome to join us. And he goes, no, I’m going to, how did he phrase that? I didn’t write it down exactly, but he says, I’m going to keep protecting the people of the West orange pavilion. Right. So, and that is the end, except for the wedding. It’s like Napoleon dynamite married marriage scenes. Yes. Although that seems pretty Epic, so yeah. Yup. They get married at the mall. She rides a segway. It’s hilarious. I did not remember. Oh my goodness. You need to go watch me now. I watched it years ago. But anyway. Yeah, you got to watch the end credits. Let’s go back and watch it. Okay, well we’ve gone over time a little bit. We have, I’m probably gonna get in trouble. No, I’m just kidding.

39:32 But our next film is also Nancy speck. Yes. Pottersville Pottersville which I have never seen a lot of big names in this movie, newer than Paul Blart mall cop. [inaudible] Stupid. Very stupid. The only actor I can remember at the moment is Ian McShane, Michael Shannon, Michael Shannon, right. And Judy Greer, Judy career. And I forget her and Christina Hendricks and I don’t even know her. But you don’t know her? No. Okay. that’s okay. Anyway, plays Michael Shannon’s wife. Okay. And, and and this was a Christmas themed movie? Yes, it is a Christmas movie. Technically come out with these like once a month. So we’re going with the Christmas theme. But anyway, good movie. It was on Netflix last year. Hope it’s still there. If not, it’s probably on Amazon cause I didn’t look, I didn’t look yet either. But you know, we’ll find it and we’ll let you guys know what the X next episode. So you, if you feel the need to watch any of these movies, and if you don’t, because we watch them, so you don’t have to, that’s perfectly fine too. We’ll give you this half hour synopsis. That’s great. Yeah. Anyway. All right, so our next step is that we’ll probably be like two days before Christmas, slightly before Christmas, just because we usually do out the 25th ish about the 25th yeah. Yeah. Okay, cool. I guess we’ll see you next month. Yeah, I like that there. Yeah.

41:13 [Outro Music].